The Taming of the Screw

Batten down the hatches, ahoy maties the freezing rain is coming tomorrow (Thursday)! Starboard and the other end, tie down the riggins! Make a bowline knot and say your prayers. Environment Canada say's it's going to be nasty). I have my Vintage Coleman Lanterns (six of them) lined up and ready to prime (hope I have fuel). I am also going to make sure the woodstove is rocking out. . . .I can cook dinner on it if I am really feeling experimental! This is going to be exciting. (oooh, not for Adam, he may have problems commuting, that won't be good). Today was spent giving the Moffat Cook Stove a nice cleaning, I wanted it sparkling for the potential buyers that are coming. In doing so, the ground became disconnected from the one Red Spot Burner, and now I can't get it back on. The screw that holds it, is not turning (used some NUTS and WD), and the place where you put the screw driver in may be stripped. See the pictures above. What am I to do? It does (as I have always said) need a rewire. . . just because it is older wiring, other than that, it is in great shape, and now I am angsting. Which I have a habit of doing. I will try again tomorrow, and maybe the screw will have loosened up. See how red and yicky my hands look, no thoses aren't scarlet gloves, that's from using cleansers. I ran out of my natural stuff and I didn't have gloves. Adam poured the concrete in the basement. The house is in the process of being jacked up. It is not like we live in a Fun House, but the floors do have slope, what should I expect from a 137 year old house. Went out for dinner with Adam's darling Grandparents. . . they are so sweet. Grandpa showed up on my doorstep, all 90 years of him . He is such a sweet man. He came in and asked if we would like to go to dinner. Grandma was waiting in the van. So the girls rode with their Grandparents, and I followed behind. (That's when I noticed Drive By Guy sitting in his car across the street). Seeing Grandma and Grandpa together is beautiful. He loves her so much and is so devoted and caring. He lives on his own, and she is in a home. Everyday he visits her, and he takes her out for a drive at times. I hope that when Adam and I get to this age that we will have the same relationship. I hope he just doesn't stuff me in a closet and only bring me out on holidays. They have been together for decades, and they are the sweetest people ever. Grandpa has some really neat stories, and some great history of the Kitchener area. It is so hilarious to see my husband, his Dad, and his Grandfather together. They all stand the same, with their hands in their pockets. Power walked. On another note, Drive By Guy is back. Drive By Guy has some issues. Drive By Guy needs some professional help. I will make an ode to Drive By Guy later. (Actually no, I won't waste my time or words on his issues, but I will keep track of things from now on. Some other people are bothered as well with his obsessive compulsive drive by's.)

Gag-o-rama

High waisted skinny jeans are in. Look at how high the rise is !!!! Are you kidding me? It's just not right. I think I might start getting sick. I noticed in my edition of Elle, waists are getting higher and the jeans are getting tighter around the ankles. This is a picture of the Cheap Monday Eiffle Tower Jeans. I think of Steve Erkle or a certain relative that remains nameless, who still wears stirrup pants, when I see this type of denim abomination. You can view these jeans straight from the source http://www.cheapmonday.com/ . I was easing up on my hatred of the skinny jeans, but it resurfaced when the jeans added an ultra high waist. There is something wrong when the waist band chafes your armpits. I will never ever wear these atrocities. If I ever do, it will signify that I need professional help or that I have sucumbed to very bad taste. (Rocker jeans. . .that's what we punks used to call the skinny jeans. . .but I guess they don't look that bad. It's the high waisted thing that is really bothering me tonight. There is nothing flattering about them). Okay, this is not an astute observation by any means, but I just had to say it. It is a tad ironic that scientists are using DNA found in the supposed Jesus Tomb from 2000 years ago, but they were not able to use DNA taken from Lynn Harper in the Steven Truscott case. I know, I am probably comparing apples to oranges. But those were my first thoughts after "scanning" the Jesus Tomb articles. Lynn Harper's remains are 50 years old, and they probably would be only able to use DNA to test for her identity, which in fact they already know, anything left under her fingernails would have been dust by the time they exhumed the body. The darn snow blower is pooched, Adam started it up today, and it wouldn't move forwards or backwards, the axle is broken or something. I dunno. It might be a pin or something. Who knows. Right now I am listening to "Chocolate and Cheese" by Ween. It has some really good tracks, and is an old favourite (well, most of the songs, not all). _____________________________________________________________________________________ Later on: As my hard drive emits sounds like nails on a chalkboard, my stereo is playing "Odelay" by Beck. Nice Nice. I am in a funk, I have been trying to alter a few pairs of jeans, and only managed to do one. The kids are back from their much anticipated ski trip, and both of them look like they have been dragged through a knot hole. My youngest, had cherry eyes, and my eldest, well, she is pale and frothing at the mouth. . They had fun though. My inlaws were quick to do the drop off, I think they were exhausted as well. On another note, because my comment moderation was not working (some viewers complained that their comments were lost, I have ended the moderation phase).

Let's Hear it for Haiku's

a slinking cat walks smoother than the onyx night salvaging strewn trash irksome background noise gravel sounds finishing cement where are my earplugs tapioca sits pale eyeballs in white glue glob dog barks at the door lace curtain windows yellow fiberglass walls curdle my belly Britney Spears head shape stubbly oblong vitamin needs to wear a wig stands outside alone not moving just observing my sneeze made him jump

First Time In A Ditch Multiplied By Two

Chevy's aren't supposed to get stuck. Especially if they are in four wheel drive and you are going 5 kilometres an hour. And they aren't supposed to get stuck twice within thirty feet of the last ditching. Then again, I was driving and I didn't want to be. I had a bad vibe, and I knew that road was icy as hell. I know it was my fault for stopping and then thinking I could reverse back to the driveway I was supposed to be in. It wasn't Antonio's fault. Here's my idea about shoulders (when the plow goes by, they should put a fine mist of phosphorescent paint, there by delineating the shoulder area, just in case). Okay, upon reflection, no, but it may be a good idea if it was ecologically friendly or maybe a type of organic fertilizer or even copious amounts of native wild flower seeds. Driving down the country road, I noticed that the road was as slick as the skin of someone who works at Mary Brown's Fried Chicken (I worked there for a day, I know). I missed my turn and slowed down, stopped and started to reverse, but actually sunk into the shoulder. I AM NOT USED TO COUNTRY ROADS!!! CHEESE AND RICE!!! My first time in the ditch. I couldn't go forward, I couldn't reverse, I was as stuck as a fly in a Venus fly trap. Then an angel of mercy appeared, I had no idea what to do when he told me he was going to pull it out with his truck. So to make a long story short (my eye is getting really small. . .left one of course). He got me out of the ditch and I thanked him profusely. He told me that there was a lane way and to use it to turn around in. He turned around, I waited, as soon as I started off again, I was in the ditch, 30 feet from where I was previously ditched. I walked my daughter (who was wailing at this point, she thought she wouldn't be able to attend. . .even though we were about 100 feet from the camp while ditched), and my other daughter helped drag the huge assed sleeping bag (it turned out to be as big as my mother trucking couch) (all the other girls had petite sleeping bags, and here is my poor previously ditched daughter with this sleeping bag that is the size of the back of my truck). Anyway I got her there. During the short jaunt, I lost about 58 I.Q. points, and when we arrived, I tried to explain what had happened. A friend was there, who happens to be a police officer, and after I called Adam,she said "Lisa . . what can I do?" I said "honestly, I have no idea, I have never been ditched before". So she rounded up a guy with a big rope and this other man who had a Blazer started to pull (my hubby had met me there in the mean time, wearing his shiny grey snow pants~~~oooh Nacho Libre). It took a while, but after about an hour the truck was out. Holy doodle with a capital J. I need a beer. I can't write anymore, I am befuddled and will elaborate later. But THANKS TO ALL THOSE WHO HELPED. That is one thing about the country, people do make an effort, and I really appreciated it, no, more than appreciated it. I can't find the words right now. (End note: I remember mumbling CAA, which I found out is not a word to mention around here. If someone can't drag you out, they find another truck, if the truck doesn't work, they find a farmer with a tractor, if the tractor doesn't work. . . someone will round up a gang of men to lift the vehicle out of the ditch. . . .you don't call CAA. . . This is Huron County and they are burly and rugged ones around here :) What I am now going to put in both vehicles: Big long rope or chain Shovel Cat litter Flashlight Mitts (I have a waterproof thing of stuff that I send Adam -candles etc. ) I will do one for myself. I think I will have to buckle under and get a cell phone. Next day: Had a good sniffle, and will take pictures of the ditched area. I think the sniffling is due again, to the altruism and good deeds of other's. When people are really genuinely nice, the tears start flowing.

I'm a lova not a sewwa

I knew my youngest was going to be going to a Brownie camp tonight. So after two days of trying to find the air mattress, with no avail, and then realizing Adam took the sleeping bag to work today, I realized I was in a pickle. What would MacGuyver do? I know that guy could make a grenade using toe nail clippings and earwax. So, I used my "stinking" cap. I used a bed support foam thing folded it over, then hot glue gunned it together ( the foam stunk like hell). Made a cover for it (I can sew in straight lines). Then using an old duvet that Adam's Grandmother made (hand plucked plummage from the farm), I tortillia'ed it, then made a fetching cover as well for it. She is going to be toasty. This took forever. I feel a tad guilty about the duvet, or "duchna" in Czech. I can pull the stitches out if need be. I could have driven in to Goderich, but the roads may have been lousy. I am not a seamstress, but for a person who failed Home Economics because the teacher did not like my sewing or embroidery attempts. . . (replacing two legs on a pair of jeans and embroidering yin and yang symbols on the bum), I think I did mighty fine. If my camera's batteries were charged, I might have posted a picture. Brownie camp. . .I never went, I made fun of the Brown Owl, and was subsequently ostracised. She was the meanest, most poc marked, adipose challenged, scary individual I have ever met. I was glad I never made it to camp. I recall from the Brownie Calendar, the camp pictures showed children, in the snow, camping inside straw bales. Which now, upon reflection, I realize that the R value would have been amazing, but at the time, staring at the calendar, I was horrified. Children in haystacks. . . good lord. I did have reservations about putting her into Brownie's but, after speaking with another set of parent's , who gave these Owls wonderful reviews, I feel much more at ease. I know my daughter won't be locked in a dark church by herself (I did it to myself, not the Owls, but they didn't save me, if it was up to them, I would have rotted), and she will be well taken care of.

A Whole Bunch of Nothing and Little Bits of Stringy Stuff On My Ceiling

After waking up to a wonky smoke detector, I did a whole bunch of nothing. Just couldn't wrap my head around any concept today. Is it the sun which is blazing through my window? Do I have Spring Fever? Amidst decluttering my mind and house, bringing in wood, I did fart around on the computer. I did take the dog for a walk down the trail. It was absolutely gorgeous, the snow was melting off the trees and the drips of water were glinting off the branches. Evidence of Spring!! (or a bit of a thaw) People can probably thank me for the warmer temperatures. . .as soon as we buy a snow blower we don't have snow in the forecast). Wookie's hackles went up midway through the walk. It irked me, I felt a tingling in my septum. It wasn't her usual hackle warning, it was a full blown Mohawk. She was completely silent. It made me feel something was amiss, and I hopped off the trail at the next exit. I have no idea what was bothering her, but she was visibly upset. Hopefully there wasn't a dead person in the snow near there. My walking buddy also phoned, and wanted to walk, after my other walk so I did get my exercise today. We noticed that a tin shed had been completely flattened by the snow load and had buckled. "Double L Power Property Police" I forget if we put up our supports in our shed. I don't even want to look. I am looking forward to a boring night. I hope Mantracker is on. LOL, that is just the funniest show I have seen for a while (it's not supposed to be funny). Adam and I started watching it, Creepy Canada, and Survivor Man while we had the flu. Oh my goodness, I am really scraping the bottom of the barrel for for my viewing pleasure. I think Adam and I should try out for Mantracker. I would completely cover myself in mud. I have noticed that most people on Mantracker do not disguise themselves appropriately. The contestants need more camouflaging, not a bright pink fanny pack. I honestly think we could do it as a couple. We work pretty good together, yin and yang that we are. Adam would look dashing in some army green fatigues, I would apply some black shoe polish under his eyes for just the right effect. I would buy that Bench jacket that I have been eyeing and wear leaves in my hair. We would be good looking prey. Later on. . . Nope, no supports were put up in the tin shed. There is about eight inches of snow on the roof. I should get out there tomorrow and shovel it off. I was going to repaint some ugly walls this week and maybe start priming my one ceiling. Here's my problem. The ceiling in question is actually really old beaded board. It was at one time pinkish, then it was painted a canned pea green. There are hundred of nails, that have rusted. I did buy B.I.N. paint. My issue is, after spending 40 hours (no exaggeration), stripping multiple layers of ten test and wallpaper that was put on with flour and water, then realizing that the last layer wasn't wall paper at all, but fabric, there are little tiny fuzzy strings that dangle a bit from each of the nail heads. What am I to do? It is obviously lead paint. I am not going to sand it. They are rough painted boards. Bob Vila would probably get Norm to whip up some reproduction ceilings, planed and routered . I don't want to sand or replace the ceiling. I just want to paint it white, but I don't want to spend another 40 hours removing little pieces of stringy stuff with tweezers. Also, because the house has shifted, there are some gaps. Do I just DAP the crap out of them and hope for the best? It's like my front room's floors. There are 1/4 inch gaps. I have heard that on boats, they use rope to fill in the gaps and then lacquer everything. I find the house too overwhelming.

Snow Blower

Have I said how much I despise snow? So, I buckled under and decided we would buy an old snowblower from a neighbour. Just couldn't face the white stuff anymore with my dilapidated (I love that word) snow scoop. Last night was the first time that I had ever used a snowblower. The thing is though, since our driveway is on a hill, it is a tad hard to use. Especially at this point in time. After using the scoop the last time, (Friday), I am still feeling the burn. My ribs are out of whack. I feel like the Hunch Back of Gypsy Lane. Honestly, the snow was piled 4 feet high at the end of the driveway and extended inward about 10 feet from the plow. I had to shovel in shifts. I made a deal with the ex-owner of the snowblower, that I will call him if I need him to start it for me. It has a pull start that is testy. It's the old trapeziods acting up. I need to get 10 and 15 lb hand weights, otherwise I am going to sag. Lord, I feel old and boring.

Blogging Disclaimers Big Questions For A Tiny Blog

Okay bloggers. . .what is the best disclaimer to have on a personal blog? Now, don't all rush at once, I know my blog traffic is through the roof ;) Blogs can be subject to libel. How far do bloggers need to go to protect themselves in Canada from lawsuits? In the US there have been cases and in Canada as well. I have done some cursory searching, but I am still unsure. So I just rambled a disclaimer off. Are there some points that ought to be made to avoid legal issues on a personal blog, or any blog for that matter? Any input would be greatly appreciated. Now don't all line up at once. . . Note: I have put the comment moderation back on for a time. . .sorry but you'll have to use the word verification.

"It's A Porridge Morning"

Note: I can now receive email at both my addy's. The one posted here is a yahoo account (just in case), and the other one, well, I had to fiddle and fart around with stuff, and finally got it to work with Netscape. Outlook Express is pooched. So now I will digress again. ____________________________________________________________________________________ As a dutiful daughter, I always manage to take the time to call my "chromosome donors" in the morning. Especially this winter, when the snow has not yet slid from the steel roof of cottage, cabin or garage . When the snow does finally give way, God help my parents, if they are standing under it. So, I like to check if they are still mobile and intact, and not buried under an avalanche of snow and ice. ( I would hate to not get an answer on the phone, and trek up to see what's wrong. Then unearth my Dad from the snow. I can just imagine digging away, and suddenly, just his eyes would emerge from the mound. No nose or face, but just the eyes. Blink. Blink.) I have asked them if it might be an idea to construct reinforced steel hats, shaped like large pyramids, that would deflect the snow, if it did fall down on them. They do not want to take my advice. My father informed my mother during THE CONFERENCE CALL that it was a "porridge morning ". I gather that he wanted something substantial to stick to his ribs. As I recall, "porridge mornings" up at the cottage, when it was a cottage, and not a full time residence, was fraughtwith horror. My Grandmother (Nana) would force my brother and I, or any other cousins that happened to be around to ingest porridge. This was not the "run of the mill" (pardon the pun) goop. This was her idea of what would be nutritious, and keep us out of the cottage for as long as possible. We were told "it will put hair on your chest". For my Grandmother's recipe a small amount of oats was added to a copious amount of Red River (very grainy), and banana's, and if we were really unlucky. . .raisins (which became bloated). This concoction, when finished was like eating gravel and something slimy. The banana's took on a character that tasted like the fruit, but was more of a sludge. There was no way of averting the porridge, and we couldn't hide it anywhere. The only way to eat the concoction was to make sure that there was a huge glass of liquid beside you, that would water down the offending slop which loomed before you. So, on an oatmeal note, I just finished baking 48 oatmeal and berry muffins. A dozen of which I am going to send with the girls skiing. I feel so domestic, or is that domesticated?

Woohoo!!!

I am utterly gobsmacked. My daughter came down the stairs and asked me if I was missing a ring. Last summer, I was planting copious amounts of Baltic Ivy, to cover the hill that runs up to our house. Between the plow and the salt on the roads, the hill is a complete eyesore. It has chunks out of it from the plow's blade, and nothing will grow. It gives that "Scorched Earth Policy" feeling. I was wearing my wedding rings, and my plain gold band gardening. As I waved to a neighbour, something flung off my finger. When I looked at my hand, I was missing my gold band. I searched in the mulch everywhere, I asked the boy across the street if I could borrow his metal detector, I had a search party try and find the ring. I told the kids, maybe someday it would turn up, my hopes weren't high, but I had a feeling that someday I would be reunited with it. My daughter found my ring, not outside, but wedged in the lid of my of Hawaiian Tropic Tan Extender. Not that I tan, I tried out tanning beds three times with horrible and painful results.(The owner of the tanning booth suggested 12 minutes, my first time, I was so red). I looked like I had been in a George Foreman. Absolutely grilled. I got my husband to take pictures, to show the owner, but alas. . .I forgot that I had put BLACK AND WHITE film in the camera. . .go figure. When recounting the episode to friends that were Tanning Veterans (who were the "Tan Pusher's"), they said no one in their right mind would recommend a newbie sit in a tanning bed for twelve minutes their first time. Thanks for telling me know prior to looking like a piece of pickled ginger. I use Tan Towels occasionally for that healthy glow, once in a while if I am feeling goth or see through (blame it on the Celtic Skin). For the gals out there, I recommend them. They are easy to use, even Hellen Keller wouldn't get streaks. But the ring was found in the lid, how weird is that!!! My youngest daughter is always finding things. Thank goodness she was so observant. I am so happy, this makes my day. I guess what flung from my hand was mud or something. I learned a lesson that day though, don't wear rings and garden, it just doesn't mix.

To Plant or Not To Plant. . .?

I saved my coveted black hollyhock and malva seeds. I am getting pretty antsy this week and I keep looking at them, wondering if Wiarton Willy the prognosticator was correct, and thinking, maybe I should start them indoors. I have no idea. . .I think you start things six to eight weeks before Spring. I definitely want to make sure that the black ones live. I want to make sure that the malva ( I am not sure of the actual generic type), grows. The malva species, is different than any other that I have had. It is bright pink, with large flowers, and is more on par with a hibiscus than any other malva I have encountered. The flowers were so fascinating, that I made sure that I saved them, and squirreled them away into a drawer in the Hoosier. It feels like this winter has gone on forever. But it wasn't until sometime in January that we actually had to start wearing snow gear, and drag our shovels out of the sheds. I want to see some green. I want to see some hope. Spring is hope. It was in December I had wandered out to the tin shed to try to remove the lawn tractor's battery, and actually found a yellow jacket nest, with a few dozy, but mobile wasps crawling around in it. I squashed the wasp's nest, but ended up forgetting to remove the battery. It wasn't coming out easily, and I figured I would come back out with a screw driver, and then got distracted by something else. Sometimes I wonder (in all seriousness) if I may have a form of Adult ADD. I will start something, and then something happens and then I am on to something else. I looked at some distance ed courses again. The Philosophy courses make me drool. My BIG ISSUE in my life is that what the heck can you do with Philosophy? My friends have heard my countless rants, about how it is a valid, and needed in life, and you can take Philosophy and use it in many different types of applications. Thomas Hurka did an excellent essay on the benefits of Philosophy. Philosophy is a great foundation for those pursuing a career in Law. But what the hell am I going to do with Philosophy? There is teaching, there are ethic boards (hospitals, etc). It can be a gateway to other careers. My other option is Psychology, my third option is Journalism. I have yet to find any distance ed courses in Journalism though. It's hard to fall head over heals in love with something, and then try to persuade yourself of it's utility. For eight years I have been humming and hawwing, and mulling and ruminating. I also have pushed it aside in the last few years, avoiding it. If I can take a full course load during the year, I can go back to work for the summer's. I just have to get the inertia going, and I did make a vow to myself that this will be the year. I just need to give myself a big swift kick in the bum, get my auctions up (when we get the new computer), and then dive in. My dishwasher (omg. . .see off topic again) is acting up. I am getting flecks. I threw a whack of pickling vinegar in it, scrubbed down the sides, tried to access the filter (no avail, need to find the instruction book), and then ran it through with some Citric Acid. It is still icky. Maybe if I take the shop vac to it and stick it in the filter area, it may clear it out. How rivetting. I am just so enthralled right now.

Canada's Wonderland Horror

I almost forgot about this picture. . .it was on the Ellen Show last year. I was just going through pictures and trashing the bad ones. Look at how calm I look. This was the first real rollercoaster I had ever been on. Considering the fact that I have huge anxiety issues with rides, except for the ones at Sauble Beach, I was A- Okay. But my kids. . .now that is funny. They will kill me if they see this, but it is too good not to share. Click on the picture to get the full effect. . .it is really hillarious close up. Oh boy this leads to another Mad Max reference "Just walk away and there'll be an end to the horror" . . . . "WE WILL NEVER WALK AWAY". LOL. Those movies are cheesy.

Alice Munro Retires

http://onewaystreet.typepad.com/one_way_street/2007/01/alice_munro_ret.html I must admit, I have been out of the loop, but I am shocked, very disappointed. The above link is the one that I originally came across. At the precise moment I encountered the news, my right eye started twitching uncontrollably. What does that mean?

Holy Snow Batman 2

I just can't help myself, one of the pictures by the back of our house shows a fence (the first pic). That fence is about 5 feet high. The drift is over the fence! Infront of our house, the snowbanks are as high as our front porch. Which is insane. . . it means well over 6 feet high! (Our house is on a hill).

Holy Snow Batman

My snow scoop became gnarled today, under the pressure of the plow's deposit. What am I going to do? Anyhow, here are some more Canadian Weather Pictures. Because as Canadian's we are so fascinated with meteorological phenomenon. Am I using the apostrophe correctly? I (of late) have been having confusion over my use of the apostrophe). I know it denotes ownership. Hmmm maybe I should edumacate myself .

Swing Low Sweet Hydro Line

Crap! I just noticed out my window that my hydro line is really low to the ground, it has dropped about 6 feet. Probably about 8 feet from the ground right now by my estimation.. The spruce tree's (town property) have the hydro line running through the boughs. Adam climbed the tree and trimmed in the summer, but with the added weight on the other boughs, I think we may have a problem Houston. Adam took "Antonio" , my truck last night to get to work, and he obviously made it home okay. Looking outside this morning, I am a bit surprised that the kids are back to school. The squalls have rolled in, yet again. I am debating whether or not I should go and shovel now, prior to the plow, and then shovel after as well. Then bring in wood, do the dishes, do the laundry, sweep and vacuum, the usual. Oh such decisions, it really makes my life feel so worthwhile and impactuous. I need to get back to London. I can't remember if Adam was slapped on the wrist for missing work on Monday (he talked to me while I was sleeping. . his mouth was moving, that's all I remember). . .I am curious to know if it was considered an ELOA or if the considered it a "Weather Day". It's up to his "manager's" discretion (I am not using the correct term here, I don't want to get him in trouble). He had to use five of the ten ELOA's allotted by the MOL for the flu. Then he had the weather day which, if used as an ELOA, would leave him four. God help him if anyone dies this year. We do have a lot of aging and sick Grandparents. I have a problem with the 10 days allotted my the MOL, if your workweek includes Saturdays, then I think that there should be some extra days thrown in the mix. Since your workweek is longer, you need more days in case of emergency, or personal illness, or situations. You do not get paid for the days that you take (so other than manpower, it doesn't cost the company that much, and they have the ability to pull from other areas), and sometimes, there are situations above and beyond your control. I guess 12 people were charged with driving on closed roads.

More Pics

Yup, seeing double, I don't know how to get rid of the double Adam. Just had and epiphany. Hampster balls for people's heads when they have colds. There should be a way of doing it. Kind of like the SAMSE (I think that was what Tom Greene called it), but it just would fit on the head of the person afflicted with an illness. Makeup and stuff could still be worn, (so you would look nice), but you wouldn't be sharing your germs when sick. Those masks we had to wear with the influenza just were ridiculous. Not that we ventured anywhere from the house. My other great thought of the day has eluded me. I am going to bed.

Winter Pics

It looks like my house is on an angle. . .it probably is. Check out those icicles. . .

Snow Day

The weather seems to have died down a bit. What a crazy few days it has been. Howling winds, snow, winds, snow. Adam was unable to go to work yesterday (all the roads were closed, he was very upset), and the kid's had a snow day as well. They were also home today. Adam was able to make the perilous jaunt to work this afternoon. In Cambridge, it was sunny, here, it was still howling. Roads started to pop open late this morning. The amount of snow that lay in wait for me at the end of my driveway was approximately hip height. Armed with my snow scoop and Wookie, I was able to remove it. Thank god for being physically fit. Two years ago, I would have been wheezing and having heart palpatations, this year, it was fun. As much fun as could be expected removing snow by hand. I do envy those with a snow blower. . .maybe next year I will have one of those toys. My walking buddy and I ventured out last night in the blizzard. I really didn't want to go, and I figured if I called her, she would decline, due to the adverse weather conditions. She called my bluff. I told her that I was only calling because it was Monday, and didn't expect to actually have to walk. She retorted it would be an "adventure", I complained about premature wrinkles. She told me to put~~ (this is funny) "a barrier" on, like "vaseline". I couldn't stop laughing. I ended up slathering my face in coconut oil and Strobe Cream. (Heck, who would see us). It reminded me of growing up, and this skinny pale faced boy named Quentin, whose mother never allowed him to use Chapstick The poor kid. His mouth was so chapped that it started at the tip of his nose and ended at his chin. Then I was reminded of another friend who was a contestant on Reach For The Top. He had chapped lips, but instead of putting vaseline just on his lips he continued until his entire lower third of his face was lubricated. Under the intense lights of the studio, my friend's face not only glistened, but reflected the light back at the camera. While watching the show, he looked illuminated and it felt that you were not looking at him, but into the sun. I learned another tidbit today. HOW TO REMOVE ONE METRE OF SNOW FROM YOUR SAGGING TRAMPOLINE (after your kids say that they can't do it). 1) Release as much protective nettting as possible in frigid temperatures. 2) Make sure you have put on your snow pants, this method takes a long time. 3) Lie on your back in the middle of the trampoline. 4) Pretend that you are breakdancing in a clockwise motion, pushing snow to the margins of the trampoline with your legs. You are spinning quickly. 5) Ignore the laughter and finger pointing of rude neighbours (you are having much more fun than they are). 6) Lie face down, pinwheeling counter clockwise, pushing the remainder of the snow with your big snowmobiling gloves and your legs simultaneously. (Even though you don't own a snowmobile, and can't remember where you attained the huge gloves). 7) Flip over on your back and look at the sky. Pretend you are dead, and wait to see if your husband or anyone is actually worried. This is actually quite relaxing. I was looking at the sky and the spruce trees that were laden with snow. 8) Give up wondering how long you could be missing before anyone notices, and trudge inside.

Weather Junkie

I hope Wiarton Willy is right. . . . The snow and the wind is not letting up, and I cannot see out my windows at times. Adam made it back okay from work yesterday (Saturday) night, it did take him almost three hours (usually one and a half), and he said it was one of the worst drives he has ever had. Roads are closed left right and centre, and supposedly the storm will not let up until at least Tuesday. I was trying not to worry about the road conditions last night while he was on the road, then around 7pm, I noticed that the roads on the MTO website had all these little boxes with orange stripes on them. Highway 25 is rarely closed (only once since we moved here). The only reason local folks say, that it does remain open, is that it is the "Salt Road" from Goderich . Which in effect means that that is the road they use to get the salt for the roads up this way. (I don't know if this is a rural myth). The only good source for road closures in this area is the CKNX radio site. I also looked at the three month forecast, and temperatures are predicted to be below normal. Meanwhile, Wookie wants a walk. . .too bad, even with the fur hat and the uber boots, I am not venturing out. It's about minus 30 with those wretched wind chills. I grabbed some wood last night, and I swear my nostrils suddenly adhered together within seconds. Plus I have this thing (which Adam finds strange) that happens with wind, I can't breath when it's windy, or if there is something in front of my face. If someone puts a hand even remotely near my face, I can't breathe.

Flying Monkeys

Something is happening to my posts here, big spaces, hard on the eyes. Messy. Absolutely nothing humourous has happened of late. Besides stepping on toy screaming monkeys in the middle of the night, I am at a loss. Mabel & Bessy (The Sister Fats) are still dragging them around, and if they are flung, or stepped on, they make a howler monkey sound. If I am found in a heap, dead on the floor, people will know that I have had a heart attack caused by stuffed elasticized primates. Okay, my computer issues are not gone, but I am sort of working. I had to get netscape, can't use internet explorer, or firefox. I have a dll file missing and it's the wininet one. I have attempted to drop it into my system 32 file about 30 times today, no avail. So I still can't really post my stuff onEbay, because if something else goes wrong, I really don't want to be NARU'D. I keep telling myself patience is a virtue. The snow and blow has impeded attempts for a power walk tonight with my power walking buddy. Wookie didn't even like going outside for a piddle. I have a "to do" list about 500 items long, but after raking the one tenants roof and getting up on a ladder to throw nylons with rock salt into the ice dam areas, I am pooped.( YES NYLONS WITH ROCK SALT WORK FOR ICE DAMS-just fill them up (wear gloves), make them look like really long sausages, don't use flesh coloured nylons though, it can look a bit, well. . . pornographic). I also shovelled the blob of snow left by the plow, and have brought in fire wood four times today. Keeping the tempwood going is of prime concern with this frigid weather. -30 wind chills are in the forecast. I keep the gas on at 67-68 during the day (about 17) and at night I have been turning it down to below 15. As I write I am wearing long johns, my uberboots, down jacket and a toque. I am temperately challenged though. Rental Thoughts I think I am going to have to be more assertive with people, and not get sucked in to sad stories. I understand hard luck, I really empathize, and it will be difficult becoming a hard ass. My husband and I have both individually and together had large doses of bad luck. Sometimes though,you don't realize the opportunities or breaks given to you. The world does not owe you. You are the master of your own fate. I remember, years ago, when I was about 18, without money (student), unable to pay rent (I lost it) (first and only time). I asked my landlord if I could do anything in lieu of rent to make up for it. The landlord gave me a break, I was thankful, I did not feel entitled. I painted the whole apartment white. The apartment had 12 foot ceilings, and had been painted deep forest green, and I had no primer, had to patch walls etc... I worked my ass off, and felt so thankful to the landlord, I will never forget her generosity. Adam saw a UFO last night on his travels home. I will try to post the picture tomorrow of him telling me about it. My camera is touch and go now too, the usb cable is stripped.